Forward Movement

Looking down I can see the road that I am on

And I stand firm again on my two feet

Though still unsure of my footing

I look back and I see the road that I have already traveled

Lined along the edges with the pain of my memories

And abounding with tell tale signs of all my mistakes

Places where I veered off the road or crashed head on with disappointment

I look back and I am surprised I made it even this far

With tears threatening with their sting to flow from my eyes

I can say I survived and I I can finally turn around and face the future

I look forward and I see the road that lies ahead of me

Unfamiliar and uncharted

Taking my next steps I can’t help but wonder just where I will end up

Because I know I’ll never be here again

Good Monday

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NW08Rc802MQ


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1C2gCXo4Gs

What I found today in NPR!

Cesar Chavez Marcha 2011

Despues de leer este articulo en El Chronicle titulado "10 Tips on How to Write Less Badly" que la professora Elvia Ramirez compartio en el facebook tuve que parar de limpiar y ponerme a escribir..."escobita nos vemos en unos minutos"

El 26 de Marzo fui a La Cesar Chavez marcha en apoyo de derechos estudiantiles y trabajadores. El dia anterio me quede despierta asta las 6am con mis hermanas, nos que preguntan que si nos gusta bailar...que si no...mmhumm!

A las 10am empeso la marcha,llegando a las 10:10am como es usual de las Lopez, nos metimos a Arteagos y nos compramos un desalluno no apto para deabeticos- barritas de freza con un Frech Vanilla por que despues de meter el vazo mediano bajo del button para el MEXICAN HOT CHOCOLATE nada mas me salio agua irviente y gris por las borbujillas de aire.


Caminamos 5.85 millas de Arteagos Supermarket (N Market Blvd, Sacramento, CA 95834) la Plaza de Cesar Chavez. Esta trallectoria para mi fue una de refleccion personal y consiensia de valores-"Por que ni el aire o viento para el movimiento!"

Enfrente de el banner de Dream Develop Do estava Natomas Middle School. Ellos eran un grupo de estudiantes muy diversos por los rasgos aparentes de la nariz, ojos, y color de pelo. Enfrente avian dos mujeres lideres de canto pequeñas de estatura y ojos de valor. Se mirava un grupo muy unido que como Dream Develop Do un grupo joven, entendemos el balor de la educacion y la importancia de participar en preservar esa oportunidad para todo joven y nino/a de esta nacion. Este dia no solamente es un dia de "paraid" sino tambien de activar gente a la causa de un hermano, Cesar Chavez, que conosia el valor de ser humano.


Admiro a su advisor, Goya Gutierrez una mujer con conosimiento en la practica de revitilizar ezperanza dia tras dia. Con siete meces de embarazo camino lado a lado con los estudiantes.

Lo que sigue

Sacramento's "We are ONE"
Save the date APRIL 4th

Monday from 5-7pm
Cesar Chavez Plaza Park
10th and Ist
Sacramento

On April 4th 1968, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated in Memphis, where he had gone to stand with sanitation worker demanding their dream: The right to bargain collectively for a voice at work and better life.

Like Dr. King, Cesar Chavez- who was born March 31st inspired a generation through his tireless advocacy for workers rights.

Today, the same demand Dr. King and Chavez inspired echoes across America. It's the demand of all people-regardless of race: The right to join together for our common dreams.

Come to this gathering to get informed about the movement of workers in Wisconsin, Ohio, India, and dozens of other states where well-funded, right wing corporate politicians are trying to take away the rights Dr. King and Chavez dedicated their lives for. It’s a time to show movement. A time to be creative, but clear.


For more information please contact Zak Ford at the Sacramento Laboe Council at 916-927-9772 or zak@sacramentolanor.org

Stranded

Feeling lost I am stranded

On some lonely deserted island

At the edges of sanity

I find it rather uneventful

The repetitive seas forever lapping at the shores of my reality

Waiting in futility for that message in a bottle

But none will ever come here

No reaches me

I watch as days die in countless numbers

I have seen the sun give birth to light in the east

I have seen it die in the west

Though they pass by in endless procession

Days never change and end all the same

Beached on the sands of seeming tranquility

I resign myself to the endless rhythm of the waves

Crashing against my paradise turned prison

I know no other place

Endless

My thoughts are much more complicated that I like them to be

As I lay in my bed at the end of a long day sleep is the furthest thing from my mind

And definitely not what I do, in futile and fruitless attempts I close my eyes

I try to blank out everything else, remove everything from my mind and finally let go

Letting go never seem so hard, like letting go of the handle bars on my bike

Or letting of the breath that I hold, not sure if it would be my last

I can do it until I am blue in the face but holding on is much more painful

I exhale, slowly, Inhale deeply, but to no avail, my mind, my emotions always win

I can't seem to ever get anything right, not even sleep

I long for the bliss of darkness, I'd surround myself in it, embrace it if I could

Were that I was not afraid of what might reside behind my eyes

The long nights filled by, filled by

Of all things absence

I long for something to fill it but I don't think I will ever find it

No, at least for a night I want the search to end, I want to put a stop to the loneliness

But I will lose what's left of my sanity if I keep trying to find it

Stranger in Stranger Clothing

I am a stranger in stranger clothing

Wishing only to fade away from the forefront of attention

I shy away from the cold unblinking stares of strange passersby

I turn my music up to high and my defenses even higher

I am a stranger in stranger clothing

I morph my outward appearance to blend in

I alter my speech and add and delete words from my vocabulary

Though you would never know it, I’d die for you to notice

I am not just another stranger on a bus I live I breathe I struggle every day

Just like you so take a look and tell me what you see

A stranger in stranger clothing or a reflection of yourself

It's... Nothing...

I come to bed hoping sleep’s embrace might just take hold of me tonight

But instead I come to bed and I find an ice cold bed of loneliness

Its not the dark that I fear anymore it’s the thoughts that race and pace around inside my head at night

Those day long slivers or repetitive thought

Day long slivers of repetitive thought

It’s not being able to get you out of my head

It’s like you flip a switch somewhere deep inside me

Because every time I see you my brain goes numb and my hearts beat grows ever louder

I feel it in my chest this tightening of my rib cage, shortening of my breath, a quickening of my pulse

It’s the deafening of my ears, the blinding of my eyes, blotting out everything but the sight and sound of you

It’s something that at times can be inexplicable, and at others actually quite predictable

Its the loneliness I fear the thought that I might never be able to hold you in my arms

And its not being able to tell you a single word of this

Away

Let us for just one night, tonight forget about everything in this crazy mad world

Forget about all the problems we face each day

Yours and mine included

Let’s slip away from all the bullshit

Withdraw from a world of negativity and escape to one of blissful unawareness

Or should I say singular awareness, it’s only you

Yes I’ll be there too like I’ve always been

Come with me let us just be

I could not ask for more than your presence

Where ever we end up sure as hell won’t matter at least not tonight

Escape with me this world will never bind us to it’s self-destruction

Come, let’s get away, so what do you say?

Nonsense

Closed eyes

Opened ears

Floating away on soundwaves

Feeling the rhythm

Pouring into my skull

The reverberation of bliss

Bouncing off of my skull

Rebounding in force

Colliding madly with my conscious

Melding seamlessly with every fiber of my being

Close my eyes

See it all flash by

Intoxicating sound

Perfect picture

Closed eyes

Opened ears

Open heart

Bleet Out

Forever cursed by possession of a heart that never knows waiting

For having a heart foolishly driven

To falling in love

For attempting to contain in lines of verse

More emotion than it can ever hold

Cursed heart left to bleed out

From with in this hollow chest into pools of words

Piled high, waiting to be fit into place

Desperate to know their placement upon pages

Upon these paper thin defenses

Defenders against insanity

Liberators of thought

Remainder of emotion

Placed perfectly on a lined canvas

Brilliant red stains on pale white pages

Some Love

Fly me to the moon but don’t fly me back

I want to wake up every day and see the world

Gaze upon it and marvel wonder where you sleep tonight

I am afraid to get any closer for fear I’d fall right back down to earth

Pulled back down by the hand of love

Never seen

But always felt

Tugging pulling

Planted firmly on almost alien soil

Standing unimaginably far

But still fearing you’ll get too close

Back to Blogging...

Ok... I guess as many people realized, a blog is set up to help get what is on your mind out in the open and organized... I haven't really been doing that lately... I have been on here posting about music and playing up my book... I have been neglecting the entire reason I needed a blog... so back to blogging...

Have you ever had the feeling that your life has been slipping out of your grasp? Like you are slowly starting to slip away from yourself and spin wildly out of control? It always tends to happen when you are flying at your highest point, almost like it's God's way of keeping you grounded saying "you are no angel, you don't deserve to be up here yet..."

Why does it happen like this? why is it that we only lose control when everything is going good? Is it because we let our guards down? Do we just assume that just because things have been going our way for this short period of time that we are now invincible? My God aren't we the ignorant ones?

Why on Earth would we be invincible? Why would we even be given the free will to believe that we are? Why can't we just live with reasonable goals and expectations of life and not get all hot and bothered every time fate decides to swing in our favor? Because as humans we desire to have things our way. As people in our culture, we all feel like we are entitled to everything that we want. And every time that things start to go our way, we forget the struggle, the heartbreak, the hardships, the fighting... all that it took to get the first scrap of what we deserved...

That first scrap is the only part that is appreciated. The rest is all assumed to be a given. "The world is mine because I got something that I wanted." WRONG! We need to appreciate things that happen to us, good or bad, for what they are. They are rewards or challenges. We must never stop fighting to get what we want, yet we must cherish what we receive as a result of our struggle.