Sweet Words

When such sweet words are no longer enough where do we turn to?

What lies we tell our friends could not be worse than the lies we tell ourselves

The musings that we pretend are there and forced smiles we know will dodge further questioning

But to find the truth we must look no further than below the surface

It’s there just hidden behind layers of false smiles and buried in the hope no one will have to see the imperfections of our very souls

Sweet words were never enough…

This

This is SUPPOSED to be a fucking awesome spoken word piece.

This is SUPPOSED to be one of my favoritve pieces I have written.

This is SUPPOSED to be so powerful that it makes you think so hard your head hurts.

This is SUPPOSED to be filled with so much emotion that the lines on this page aren’t enough to contain the ink blotted tears.

This is SUPPOSED to be a wake up call for those who wine about what they don’t have.

This is SUPPOSED to be a reminder that there are those who don’t have the luxury of having a warm place to sleep at night.

This is SUPPOSED to be a call to action to all of you people idly sitting down as our government controls every aspect of our life.

This is SUPPOSED to be a gently caress on the cheek of your loved one.

This is SUPPOSED to be a slap on the face to that asshole who called you fat.

This is SUPPOSED to be that late night call, asking you to come over…not to fuck, but to cuddle under the blankets and kiss.

This is SUPPOSED to be about SEX!

This is SUPPOSED to be about LOVE!

This is SUPPOSED to be about HATE!

This is SUPPOSED to be about expressing yourself.

This is SUPPOSED to be good.

This is SUPPOSED to be bad.

This is SUPPOSED to be me.

This is SUPPOSED to be you.

This is SUPPOSED to be us.

This IS open thoughts.

This IS closed doors but open windows.

This IS everything you want it to be.

This IS, Poetry.

You have no right to judge me.

The same as I have no right to judge you.

Perceptions should not be the basis on which someone should come to a conclusion about another person.

This post isn't about one person in particular, however in this holiday season, I have noticed a dip in the amount of Christmas spirit. (Present company included)

This is supposed to be a time for joy, love, peace, and happiness.

Instead I see bickering, fighting, arguments, self pity, and people being secluded and alone.

But, maybe secluded is how they are happy. As I stated before, I have no right to judge or make decisions based on perceptions.

I really don't know where this post is going, just felt that something needed to be said about the lack of humanity and Holiday cheer this year.

Maybe I'm just growing up and this is how it goes from here on out... God I hope not.

If that is so though, how could so much change over one year?

Lost

Ok second post in a day and even in an hour but I have to put these up they are 2 of my newest pieces and becoming 2 of my favorites

Feeling like I’m all but invisible, cuz I know you don’t really see me

All you ever see is the words that I lay down here right in front of me

Like a shield they are something I hide behind

When all I really want is to have you here by my side

Just as long as you’re here sitting close to me, it don’t matter what we do

So let’ leave this city in the rear view if just for tonight

Take a chance lets go find out just how far we can make it on this tank of gas and the money in my pocket

Pick a place we head out tonight, quick let’s get lost tonight

There’s no place that I’d rather be than anywhere with you

Speak

I told myself I wouldn’t do this and I tried so very hard to keep you from my mind

But I find that you still fill my every thought and now you’ve even made your way into my dreams

I hate just how real it felt that night I couldn’t tell the difference between the you in my dreams and you in my reality

The scary part is not that you were there it’s that I wish I could have stayed

Seems that it’s as close as I will ever get and now even that is too far away

I told myself I wouldn’t do this again, my heart still aches from lovers come before

That I am sure will pass but this, this will never do, I wish that I could just tell you

But for reasons unknown still the words escape my tongue

Instead they’re left on pages strewn across my bedroom floor

Still there in the hope that one day I might pick them up and give them a voice to speak

Final Excerpt...

This will be the last passage from my book that I will be posting on M.I. well... for now at least.

This is a part of Chapter 2: The Best of Times

The bus ride back was much more subdued than the first ride of the day. It was my belief that this was because the enormity of that night was finally sinking in on all of us. I knew it was hitting me hard.

"Anyone else getting nervous?" Anthony asked.

"A little. But I think that it's just because I'm trying to decide on whether or not I should wear pants under my gown tonight." Jack replied.

"Oh my God Jack! Why would you even think like that? No one here wants to see your thingy." Lily said as the rest of us nodded to agree.

"What are you nervous about bud?" Charlie asked turning to Anthony.

"I guess I'm nervous about the future." Anthony said as the bus pulled into the school parking lot. We began walking back to the bike rack. "You can never really know what is going to happen tomorrow."

"But that's the fun part," I chimed in. "Life would be no fun if we knew what was going to happen next."

"Yeah, there are only three things that are certain in life. Death, taxes, and Timmy's awkwardness around women." Jack added.

"Quit being such an A-hole Jack!" Lily said smacking him in the arm with the back of her hand. "Plus, Tim has never been awkward around me, well, no more than his usual weirdness."

This was a perfect time for one of Charlie's great insults, "But you're not a woman though." We all started laughing as Lily began repeatedly hitting him.

"It was worth it." He uttered as Jack pulled Lily away.

Please Say "Yes"

Yes I am still thinking about you and I know that it’s too much to say

But I don’t know if I can put it any other way

Clocks and time pieces no longer hold meaning for me

I feel like I have too much time on my hands

Still it’s like there are not enough hours in a day

This has gotten to be too much and I have to stop it but I don’t know how

To keep from going crazy I try and put it all on paper

With pen in hand I try to fill the page with the thoughts and emotions that I am too stupid to show

I hate it because I know better than this and I know that this won’t change a damn thing

Me being me is not on a page it’s in the heart that beats inside my chest

Giving myself a chance to shine won’t come from this here pen

Instead I’m reaching out to the stars again, hoping I can pull one down to help me light my way

Won’t you take my hand, follow this here light where ever it might go

Take a chance and discover just what lies beyond that horizon?

Please say “yes” I promise you that adventure is not the only thing I can give you

Past

Trying to live the best life that I can and no one can say that I am not

I am going to hold on to new light, love and happiness

Letting go of all the the darkness, pain and sorrow that had invaded my very being

Moving on to bigger and better things, I can’t erase the past but only because reality won’ let me

Not that blotting it out would be easy so my time and energy would be better spent else where

And giving up would be too easy and I will never let it get that far

I have nothing to prove to anyone, and I have only myself to be true to

I have got a new lease on life, it ain’t perfect and it won’t be easy

But nothing I ever wanted to achieve would ever be handed to me

I had to fight, struggle and better myself to attain my dreams

To this day I fight for what I know is truth, what I find out of reach

I stretch out my arms reaching for new heights and never looking down

Not because I am afraid of the unimaginable heights but because I know

That which is past me is just that: past, done with… over

Make It A Mess

Is it written on my face or is there a neon sign that tells everyone just how much pain I am in?

I feel like you could see right through me and all my thoughts and emotions shown clearly in the light

Try and hide but I know it’s not working the guilt it cuts right through me

The pain it just might be the end of me and there is nothing in my power to stop it

I fight for ever breath that I take, this constant battle it leaves me weak and tired

I may not look it but I am battered and beaten I just hide it from you

I am lost and lonely but more scared than anything

What will you say, what will you do when you see just how broken down I am

Inside I struggle to keep it all in but my heart can take no more of this

The light I once had, the smiles I once put on no longer keep the demons at bay

I am not only a mess I make it a mess I never know what to say

But some how I make it through every day like a soldier marches on

My life is still keeping in step with the deadly cadence

How can I keep up if all I need is rest, a break from the pain

Think Think Think (Drink Drink Drink)

Well it’s obvious to see that there are lots of things on my mind

And every thought stays and stays and every dream plays and plays

Okay! So that’s enough with these killer thoughts and it’s high time I start killing these thoughts

With weapons drawn I slay these thoughts

Weapon of choice? Old No. 7. I lay these restless thoughts finally to rest

At peace with the lack of control but not sure of what to do

Breaking it down to a science:

Pour it, drink it, forget it! Think think think turns to drink drink drink

Hold it down and start over again

Morning comes and the damage is done but get up and do it again

Waking NIghtmare

On waking, eyes open, bed shaking

Nearly screaming I am trying not to lose it

Any I know you must be asking what’s got me so fucked up

But it’s like this nearly every morning

No one really knows it but I think I am going crazy

When the sun goes down and the darkness comes

The nightmares sneak and crawl and make their way inside my head

There they play over and over like strange shows behind my eyes

Untitled (for now)

Take a deep deep breath, as I try to think

Think of anything to say that might catch your notice

Something that might make you notice… well me

If only I could find a voice to tell you just how much I feel for you

If only I could give name to what exactly what it is I feel, for at this point I cannot tell

I miss you yet you’ve never been mine to miss, I think of you like nothing and no one else

My mind can find it’s way to the furthest reaches of the universe

Explore galaxies and catch rides on solar flares

My mind can take trips to the darkest depths of incredible oceans

Swim with schools of beautiful creatures

But my mind can never be too long a way from you

No matter what I do there you are just behind my eyes that smile and that sweet laugh of yours

Thought upon thought upon thought fill my brain but though upon thought won’t make things change

Still I only know you from inside my dreams

If I had a chance I would ask you for a chance to get closer to you

For a chance to learn what you hold dear, to learn what makes you smile

Give me a chance to be what you hold dear to be what makes you smile

another excerpt...

More from the book... here goes...

Within a half an hour the room had finished eating and the music began. For their first dance as man and wife, Charlie and Stacy had chosen some slow song by this trashy britpop singer that I had never even heard of. I decided to sit this one out and just do a little people watching. I was completely stunnned by the dance. The way time seemed to stand still as the complete attention of the entire room was fixed on that single couple, holding each other so lovingly, so wonderfully, centered in the spotlight. That was what I wanted, I was craving it, I needed it... Hell, I deserved it.

I tried hard to shake off those feelings, it was Charlie's big day. I had absolutly no right to cheapen the memory of that day with my self pity. So instead I sat quietly, drinking my next glass of champagne and watching as the dance floor slowly filled with more and more couples to finish off the song. All the while Charlie and Stacy still at the center of the room.

After a few more glasses of bubbly, I took to the dance floor. I was feeling nice and loose and was ready to make an ass out of myself. I made my way to the dance floor dancing with anyone that would dance with me. I wasn't having much luck. I only had the oppertunity to slow dance twice, and for one of them I had to cash in a dance that Lily had owed me since high school.

The Worst of Times

Another excerpt from my book. This is from the chapter "The Worst of Times."

As I got closer I got more and more nervous. I had the whole thing planned out in my head, but you know what they say, "if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans."

I pulled up outside and walked my way up to her door. I guess she saw me because she opened the door and invited me in before I even got to the porch. My hand never left its spot on the small blue box in my pocket.

"Hey Tim, I got something I gotta say." She started.

"Let me go first." I blurted out, and she nodded. "Well I know that we have only been dating for about eight months, but" I grabbed her hand. "I love you more than anything in the world. I have never felt this way about anyone before. I would take a bullet for you. Okay, I'm starting to ramble," I gave a small nervous chuckle.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is, I need you by my side." I got down on one knee and pulled the box out of my pocket. As I opened it I said, "Will you marry me?"

She looked down at me and her eyes started to fill as if she were about to cry. She closed her eyes for a slight second longer than a longer than a standard blink and a tear rolled down the side of her face.

"Oh my God... Tim." She started as another tear formed and dropped, leaving a tiny wet streak as it made its way down her face. "I don't know what to say."

"Just say yes Helen. That's all you need to say." My hands were shaking as my nerves grew from her hesitation.

"Tim... I'm pregnant."

My jaw dropped. "But... But... But we haven't even..." my voice trailed off in disbelief.

"I know, I'm so sorry Tim." She took a few steps back and burst into tears as I fell to my hands and knees. "I'm so sorry," she repeated.

"Just stop Helen," I told her putting the ring back in my pocket. "I love... loved you Helen. I never did anything to you, and you repay me by fucking some other guy?" I was starting to shake again, but not from nerves, from anger.

"I'm so sorry Tim." She said through her sobs.

"STOP SAYING THAT!" I shouted from my knees, I must have startled her because she jumped. "I quit school for you. I gave you my heart, I gave you everything Helen... EVERYTHING!!!" I pounded my fist on the floor. "I gotta get out of here..." I said to myself getting to my feet.

I walked out and slammed the door behind me. I just started walking down the street. I wasn't sure where I was going, I just had to get away from there. My head was swimming, it was flooded with the thoughts of the last eight months.

I soon arrived at a park. I looked around to see where I was, then I sat on one of the benches. I reached into my pockets and pulled out two things, the ring and my phone. I stared at the ring in my left hand as I used my right hand to call the one person that I could talk to at that moment. Charlie.

Guarded

Heart that is guarded behind false smiles and false assurances

Walled in by the pain, beaten and broken tears mixed with blood

Tucked away no longer worn on the sleeve of outstretched arms

Remain hidden within this chest but the safest place is still further away

Looking deep inside fear grabs hold and uncertainty digs it’s claws in

Heart so well guarded could never be reached but only set free

Walls break down brick by brick

Heart mended piece by broken and shattered piece

Heart so beautifully disastrous and dangerously fragile with a million cracks on the surface

Telling the tale of love’s catastrophe it could fall apart at any given moment

Standing alone on the pedestal with no end of loneliness in sight

Afraid not only of remaining here guarded but thin lies and fake smiles

But of taking that step off the edge not knowing if there will be a place to land

Or just more pain, more of the same

Intro

Everyone I talked to about my last post wants more of my novel... so I thought I would post the short intro to it...

Words like "best friend" and "love" are very over used in today's modern culture. Even to the point that, for some people, those words have lost all meaning. People who have only met three or four times are calling each other best friends and saying things like, "we have so much in common." Guys are telling girls that they love them no more than two weeks into their relationships.

The point of these words was originally one in the same, to seperate the people that we can honestly trust and believe in, from those who, frankly, could care less if we live or die. I know that sounds a little harsh, but in the most basic form, it is true. While it is true that you can love more than one person, and it is also true that you can have more than one best friend, every person that you know should not fall in to one of those catagories or the other.

This story is about the true meaning of a friendship, and how you can truly love another human being. This is a total work of fiction, but it does draw upon moments of my life and the lives of those around me. I am sure that some moments in this will also ring true with you in your life. If this is so, use this as a guide of sorts to knowing who your true friends really are.

I was blessed enough to learn who my true friends were at a young age. I still keep in touch with them to this day and I can honestly say that I love each and every one of them.

So again I say, use these words sparingly. They are reserved for those who are special to you in so many ways. Keep in mind who is a true friend and who you truly love and truly loves you. And most importantly enjoy it.

Take A Page From My Book...

And I mean that litterally... this is a passage from the novel I am writing. It slightly describes how I started writing.

When I got home that night I was in a writing mood. I didn't even bother eating, I just went straight into my room and turned on my radio as loud as it would go, then I grabbed my notebook and a pen. I had to write.

I sat down on my bed and stared at the blank page infront of me. My brain was racing, my thoughts bounced from Sandra, to Charlie, back to Sandra, to the potential strain this would put on the friendship of Charlie and I, and back to Sandra. I couldn't get her out of my head, everytime I tried, something pulled her back in.

I kept thinking about the way she made me feel, it felt like I couldn't breathe, but in a good way. I got butterflies in my stomach, and my head started spinning. It felt as though she had knocked me flat on my ass and I couldn't get up. The weirdest thing was, no matter how scary that felt, I couldn't get enough.

It seemed as if I had just blinked and when I opened my eyes and looked down, the page was full of words. I read through what I had subconsiously written and it was one of the best poems that I had written in a while. But even with how proud I should have been of that poem, all I could think of is how Sandra would react if I showed her. I knew she loved poetry. I wanted to show her that poem, tell her that it was written for her. But deep down I knew that I would only do the first half of that.

Back to Poems

This one is called "I Love You"

Three O'Clock in the morning
And I can't sleep again
Just thinking about you
Your voice inside my head
Same thing over and over
Remembering what you said
Three words that change lives
Uttered under your breath
These same three words
That I before had said
These same three words
Repeating inside my head
I have said them once
Now you have said them too
All that is left to say
Is how much I love you.

Lonely Walk

I went along on my long and lonely walk

One… Two… Left… Right…

I moved in step to some inaudible, unknown cadence

Lost in thoughts as I stared blankly at gray skies above

Unknowingly I continued on as my legs and feet carried me in no particular direction

One… Two… Left… Right…

The bitter cold shown my breath in twilight’s dim glow

While looking around I saw the empty street and no one else

With a laugh barely more than a whisper I came to a stop

One… Two… Left… Right…

Just like it came the moment passed and thus I continued on my long and lonely walk

Not a destination in mind but still I moved and not once did I dare to look back

Almost afraid to admit the truth of the journey

One… Two… Left… Right…



Give Me

In the Raw (this is new)

Long ago I decided not to let the chains that bind me to the earth win

I won't take no for an answer and and I won't settle for anything less than spectacular

I want to get back the life I used to live, get back to a time when I wasn't blinded by the pain

Break through to the other side of misery, put this world in my rear view mirrors

Bring it all back to me: life, love...happiness give me back my smile, wipe away these tears

Shatter these walls and take back the sky give me back what's mine

I used to want to dream, but now I just want to live

Give me a heart that beats, eyes that see, a voice that speaks, legs that stand and feet that walk

I am coming back to life with each passing moment it comes back to me

I feel it's warmth slowly melt away all the pain of yesterday

I feel it deep inside my bones, and inside my chest it swells as breath suddenly returns

I see the stars, they fade away as I regain my strength

My heart it finally beats, my eyes they finally see, I found my legs to stand on

Picking myself back up again learning how to crawl again, and trying too soon to walk

I might stumble, I might miss a step but I won't give in

I won't give the it a backward glance, the chance that I might lose sight again

Of the truth that I long forgot was true

Inspiration/Legacy

Ok so when was I ever this insightful??? I really like this one I think this is easily one of my favorite pieces. Though I think that this was definitely written anywhere between 4-6 years ago I still can't believe this one could have come from me nowadays let alone when I was a hormone driven teenager...

Well here we go then

Inspiration it can come from anywhere, it can reach you even when you’re not awake

In the form of dreams or even in the form of a nightmare but still it is what it is

A single word can inspire to build a great nation and it can make you want to level cities

It’s all it takes to set the world ablaze and crumble regimes but still we all have it inside

We all have a desire to have a purposeful life one that we hope will be remembered

We are only promised today but we all look forward to tomorrow and back on yesterday

We can spend our lives wishing or we can go and be what we want to be

Doing what we want to and fulfilling our greatest dreams and leaving behind our legacies

What will I leave for the generations to come? I will leave a piece of myself

I will leave my words and all my poems in hope that they will inspire someone

In hope that it will be that one thing that someone is looking for when they are down

That is what I will leave for others as my own legacy

December 5th 2009

December 5th, 2009

A day I will not soon forget.

I had been feeling sick for weeks, and this was my doctor’s appointment to get the results of a few blood tests.

The doctor had called me and said I needed to come in to discuss a very urgent matter.

Normally, very few things scare me but believe me you, I was scared shitless that day.

When I got to the doctor’s office, sitting in that clammy waiting room, those fifteen minutes seemed like days.

When my doctor told me, “Francisco, your blood test came back and we need to start you on chemotherapy right away, you have Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia, something that is rare in adults, we have caught it early, and we believe we can put it in remission with the proper treatment.”

My first reaction was disbelief!

How could I of ALL PEOPLE have CANCER?

I barely even get a cold!

How do I tell my parents? My friends? Will I lose my job? HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO PAY FOR THIS?

I waited a week before telling anyone.

One week of despair, one week of being lost in my own thoughts, one week of feeling like giving up.

You see, Cancer is very sneaky.

You don’t just have to deal with the illness, but it comes with a whole bag of goodies along with it.

Depression is the worst.

Insomnia.

Anxiety.

Lack of appetite.

Bruising.

Pain.

Pain.

Pain.

And even more pain.

Not to mention needle pricks that make you look like a total crack head.

You have no energy.

The smallest activity feels like a week of boot camp.

And the feeling that you are being punished for something horrible.

There was a point during this past year where I gave up.

I lost my job.

My apartment.

My will to continue fighting.

You see the thing about me, I was putting up a very good front.

Smiles, bring more smiles, but only when those smiles are from the heart.

What makes the heart smile? Music.

It has literally been my life support.

My fundraiser was AMAZING.

I can’t thank my friends enough for all the hard work that was put in to make the even a complete success.

My clients, I received a little over $3,000 from mail in donations alone! I could not have continued treatment without their contributions.

Life has a silly way of making you reevaluate yourself and your surroundings.
In the past year I have learned so much about myself and the people around me.

As hard as this has been, I’m glad it happened.
It’s been a year since that day, and I’m proud to say that I’m still going strong as ever.

February is my last scheduled treatment.
Wish me luck everyone.

Thank you all.

I love you very much.

Confession

I have forgotten just how much I used to actually write. These are my very early works from a time when life was a lot simpler. i still remember writing some of these, I hope that ya'll don't mind but I will keep bringing these ancient works out. These may be some very old works but I still believe that these hold value for anyone who might happen to read them. I know that these feelings somehow keep coming up and I know that they may never stop coming up, because we as people will never stop falling in love and at times, albeit regrettably out of love.

Again we stand alone without a word spoken between us and only silence remains

It is as if we say what we need to say without saying it out loud

I can’t bear the silence; I need to let you know, finally, how much I feel for you

I can only hope to break the silence by speaking out, finally shattering my fears

I speak only loud enough for you to hear; my confession is only yours to witness

I can feel the shackles break and fall to the floor as I move closer to you

Making my way from the greatest distance between us was simple

All it took was one word, once I began the rest was easy just like walking

In the end I realized that it was silly for me to hold so much back

I needed to release my restraints, I finally did and my love took flight

Forgettable

This one is all *her* I hate it that this one is not new and fresh tho... Have had this one for a while now even though I think of it as forgettable it's really not. No one can ever forget a block of time more than 5 years long. But One can try and I might just put it behind me soon enough. Life moves on and so must I but looking back and moving forward is a good way to fall flat on my ass. Something that I will not allow myself to do. Well with out further adieu here it is.

Forgettable

Forgetting you were everything to me, you were my waking moment

You were my final thought when I slept at night it was all so real to me

Yet all so false at once, it all was gone as fast it was there

Forgetting what it was that I felt was so easy to do

The last time I thought I of you it was because I remembered how much I hated you

I don’t think that you know it, I have moved on and your spells no longer linger with me

They are all gone and now you are left with out power, left with nothing

In the end you were so forgettable, all too forgettable

La Oscuridad

I've been content with lonlliness for way too long.
Memories blurring becoming a deep abyss of nothingness.
Sadness overwheling the masked feeling of what I thought to be happiness.

Nothing makes sense anymore.

Thoughts too jumbled to know the begginiong from the end.
Darkness filling the once lit path of my stray life.
Falling deeper into everything and nothing at all.

Knowing the darkness is infinate and no one will be there to catch me.

Yes another one!!!!!!

Sleep won’t come to me tonight

I can’t seem to find it and it’s all I want

One night of actual rest the kind that lead to good mornings

No more waking nightmares, no more terrors behind my eyes

Bring me peace, give me life, take my burden and lay it down

Take it all and give me nothingness, silence

Fight to keep from breaking down

Struggling to keep it together when all I want is to breakdown

If at all make it spectacular

Take me to the land of dreams and leave me there

Let it all come down, break down these walls

Come crashing down on me like the pouring rain

Don’t stop me this time, let those tears run down

Don’t say a word, let me fall just this once

Birthday Wish

Since this is December, and December is my birth month, I thought I would go ahead and let you all in on my birthday wish.

My birthday wish isn't anything big, such as world peace. Nor is it anything material, such as a new car.

My birthday wish is something simple, something ordinary, something... normal.

My birthday wish is for me to just be able to relax. To spend some time catching up with old friends. To have a day with nothing bad happening, just a group of people, a few drinks, good conversation, and good laughs.

It isn't too hard to do. It isn't that far out of reach. But yet, it seems like it can't happen.

Some of my closest friends are out of state, others have work. Hell, some of my closest friends aren't even that close anymore.

So is it really too much to ask? Would you really deny me my birthday wish?

Broken

Here I stand alone, staring at the mirror

Not knowing just who’s looking back at me

A stranger with stranger eyes sits there mockingly

Those eyes, empty and cold like frozen lakes

Eyes that turn from ice to fire in a flash

Anger burns white hot, hatred embedded within

Blood makes its way from the surface of my fist

As shards of glass crack and splinter

Landing in pools of my blood

Still standing here unblinking and unchanged

Only broken

Never know what to call these things...

It's corny, I know. Don't judge me!!! LOL hope you like it tho.

She walks into a room and even time has to stop and stare
Breathing suddenly becomes an impossibility
She takes my breath away and I have to get it back
Get it back quick before I end up on the floor

I never seem to get it right, I wish that I could be less predictable

She makes my heart beat faster and I can never help it

Caught a glimpse of her eyes and my heart nearly stopped

It felt as if it would burst out of my chest at any moment

Hope she’d help me put it back, before I pass out

Never knew just how much could happen in an instant

Had I blinked I would have missed it

The moment was here and gone before anyone knew it

A moment that I could chase forever

Not this time, yet I reserve the right to revel in that moment

But life moves forward and I hope I can get past this lump in my chest

Take that first step; let her know the rush I feel when she looks at me

Make her my favorite girl if only she’d let me