Untitled (for now)

Take a deep deep breath, as I try to think

Think of anything to say that might catch your notice

Something that might make you notice… well me

If only I could find a voice to tell you just how much I feel for you

If only I could give name to what exactly what it is I feel, for at this point I cannot tell

I miss you yet you’ve never been mine to miss, I think of you like nothing and no one else

My mind can find it’s way to the furthest reaches of the universe

Explore galaxies and catch rides on solar flares

My mind can take trips to the darkest depths of incredible oceans

Swim with schools of beautiful creatures

But my mind can never be too long a way from you

No matter what I do there you are just behind my eyes that smile and that sweet laugh of yours

Thought upon thought upon thought fill my brain but though upon thought won’t make things change

Still I only know you from inside my dreams

If I had a chance I would ask you for a chance to get closer to you

For a chance to learn what you hold dear, to learn what makes you smile

Give me a chance to be what you hold dear to be what makes you smile

Give Me

In the Raw (this is new)

Long ago I decided not to let the chains that bind me to the earth win

I won't take no for an answer and and I won't settle for anything less than spectacular

I want to get back the life I used to live, get back to a time when I wasn't blinded by the pain

Break through to the other side of misery, put this world in my rear view mirrors

Bring it all back to me: life, love...happiness give me back my smile, wipe away these tears

Shatter these walls and take back the sky give me back what's mine

I used to want to dream, but now I just want to live

Give me a heart that beats, eyes that see, a voice that speaks, legs that stand and feet that walk

I am coming back to life with each passing moment it comes back to me

I feel it's warmth slowly melt away all the pain of yesterday

I feel it deep inside my bones, and inside my chest it swells as breath suddenly returns

I see the stars, they fade away as I regain my strength

My heart it finally beats, my eyes they finally see, I found my legs to stand on

Picking myself back up again learning how to crawl again, and trying too soon to walk

I might stumble, I might miss a step but I won't give in

I won't give the it a backward glance, the chance that I might lose sight again

Of the truth that I long forgot was true

The Daily Grind

Today I had this terrible feeling one that I couldn't shake no matter what I was doing
I thought to myself: Why do I do the things that I do?
I then began thinking of all the things that I do
I think about how I wake up every morning and get ready to hit the daily grind
Ride to work, pass the next 4 hours there then ride back home
I am over simplifying but you get the picture, right?
Nothing in between and what for? Is this really what life has is store for me?
I feel like a stranger in my own skin, nothing like the me I like to remember
The younger me, the Alex who had a reason to smile
Back when the days were worth living and love was worth having
Not the hollow empty me who only goes to and fro
Only enough to get through the daily grind
I never thought that I would be able to go to bed with a stranger
But I do it every night when I finally do get to sleep
I would run and hide from this stranger but he's in my skin
I see him in the mirror, his face so familiar but still not me
It goes on and on but the fact of the matter is simple
I am giving everything I can to get through the daily grind
While I lose myself in my self made madness
I can't stand another day of grind, grind, grind
I could grind my teeth to dust and still not be done
But the grind rolls on and on and tomorrow I will be at it again... I hope...